Tur Day Fraance Stupid Comment Du Jour

SNIDE COMMENTATOR: O Riccardo, Riccardo! Wherefore art thou Riccardo? Deny thy silly name (Cobra) and refuse thy dope; Or, if thou wilt not, be but sworn to ride again, And shalt not longer be ragged upon.

Riccardo [Aside.]: Shall I hear more, or shall I speak at this?

SNIDE COMMENTATOR: 'Tis but thy name that is the enemy. Thou art thyself, though not a Cobra. What's Cobra? It is nor Trikki, nor Pirate, Nor Kaiser, nor Badger. O, be some other name Belonging to a man. For dost not thine name beckon to be called the Snake of the Trouser? That which we call a Cobra By any other word would reek of a stench. So Riccardo would, were he not Cobra called, Retain that perfection which he owes Without the title Douche. Riccardo, doff thy name; And for thy name which is no part of thee, for thou be the Trouser Snake.

Ricco, dude, we miss you. The Tour needs a douche and nobody has stepped up in your absence.