Autopsy Turkey

Here it is: step by step photos. Use for preparing turkey or autopsies on your favorite corpse.

It was so young. Pity.

Standard "y" cut.

Mmmmm. Breasts.

Autopsy reveals that it died of head/ neck separation.

Looks like the end of "Braveheart".

We'll not be using rib separators but we will be separating the ribs from our friend.

Feeling hollow.

Rebuilt.

Mmmm. Bacon and butter.

Stitching him back. The family usually requests this for open casket purposes.

Ready for the casket.

I always have left over parts when I build stuff.

Death of the Forum

It looks like Teton has had enough. Just speculating here but with all the whiny, overly sensitive butt munches out there complaining about the content, I don't blame him for shutting it down. I have very little patience for the overly sensitive. Harden the fuck up!

This year has been weird when it comes to the Colorado cycling public. First the conspiracy theories regarding Beth which basically started and ended with the forum. Then the little whiny pussies turned on those who they deemed inappropriate posters and bitched nonstop to get the anonymous forum monitored. God forbid they would start their own. It's like someone pleading with the government to ban porn sites and then buying a Hustler at the gas station.

I have always been under the general impression that a lot of bike racers are whiners especially in the development categories. You win a 3s or 4s race and you better upgrade or you are a sandbagger. You sprint for a win and they blame you for sitting in and poaching the finish. It is kind of funny because every crit is basically a microcosm of a lifespan. There are those who get it and those who don't. There are winners and there is pack fill in every category. There are those who push themselves to move to the next level and those who stay in fear of having to change their training in order to compete at a new level.

So if you plan on winning a bike race, remember this: there at least 50 losers in any given crit. Don't let them convince you to join them. Keep every race in perspective no matter how you place. There is no coulda, woulda, shoulda and there are no good excuses.

Stretching Out The New GS Suit

It's a thing of beauty, eh? I need an assistant to get the thing off. Hoorah Canada.

Old New GS Skis

I bought a pair of 05/06 fischer RC4 GS skis at the Team Summit this year for $129, put an old pair of Marker bindings on them and today took them for a test run. Happy to report that my alcohol-enhanced mounting job held. These skis rock! 21 meter sidecut on a 178. Freakin rock!

We're supposed to get 3-5" on Sunday accoring to the only good source: SnowForecast.com. We definitely need snow. 9News', Kathy "the clueless" Sabine will more than likely hype the snow levels to 5-8".

Jaime and Richard's Bouldergasm 07

Our first Boulder ride together. Aaaaaahhhhh.

Oh So Mediocre

I have lived in Summit long enough to not expect much from the opening day of skiing at any of the resorts and this year Copper really rose to my expectations! One fantastic white strip of death polished to a crusty sheen by boarders (bless their little hearts) and the terminal intermediates. The Speed Douche Bags were out in force; this is probably the only day the entire season where they are useful. I need to go on record with opinion of the Speed Patrol (not sure of their actual title).

First of all they all ski like shit and should be spending time making turns instead of standing on the hill. The average level of competence in that group is terminal intermediate. This is where the basic problem lies. There is no basis of judgement whereby they can adequately determine who is and is not "in control". Speed is not necessarily an indicator of control and anyone on the hill can generally tell who has zero regard for the others and is skiing like a douche. Although these douches are rare, the resort thinks it needs a legion of incompetents pulling over anyone who they feel is skiing too fast. Again, I must stress that these are some of the shittiest skiers on the hill. Why would anyone want to take this rightfully unappreciated job? A free ski pass and the authority equivalent of a retail center rent-a-cop. This creates a deeper un-appreciation for the people themselves.

What kind of idiots would sell their ski seasons to be incompetent douche bags, blazoned in yellow and standing on the hill for a minimum of 15 days, and skiing like shit and not getting any better for a $350 season pass. The answer: the most insecure and lamest people on the planet. If you feel that you are lame and ski like shit, Copper's taking applications.